General

This is one of those things that's always going to be different for everyone. I've had it where love hit super fast and where lust was the driving force and love took longer or just not at all. Best I can say is to enjoy the ride and if you feel like it's going nowhere after too long part ways before you resent eachother, but if you find someone you love and loves you back cherish it.

“Lust and Love”
By Zonker (aka GrowingLoveHandles)
***
A lust for thinness,
for boniness,
for what society deems as perfect,
that lust can sometimes turn love ugly,
can make it seem so, so -
so filled with self-hatred
and violence against one's own flesh.
——
But when one's lust is for softness, for roundness
for the beauty of bulging blubber,
for luscious love handles,
for pulchritudinous potbellies,
or cute soft rolls and folds of chub
growing in just the right places,
or the lust for thick creamy thighs or wide wobbly hips,
or delectable double chins,
——
Or a lust, a desire really, for adipose covered bodies,
reclining in satisfaction, or hungrily rising,
waddling toward tables heavy laden with tempting foods,
or staggering away from finished feast, the empty plates,
——
A big fat lust and addictive desire
for round billowy breasts and sensuously soft pliable flab,
the kind of flab you can feel, you can measure between thumb and forefinger,
——
A lust for life itself, for food and feasting,
for what makes us all human,
our hunger and our fleshiness,
our pleasures, our joys,
——
Lust for the waves of
hunger and satisfaction, for hedonistic gluttony,
for delicious finger-licking decadence leading to .....
mmmmmoooooore and more --
——
And more to love.
——
Then that love, that love
born of that gluttony and lustiness,
is wondrous to have and to behold!
***
I wrote this years ago. Nothing at all to do with the topic, but thought someone might enjoy it.

Love it!

Love for me is where I connect on a personal level in multiple categories... shared values and sense of humor, creativity, EQ, interests etc. The more connections the more love...

Lust is more primal and for me can have nothing to do with love... this is usually a simple matter of shared kinks and mutual attraction or me just wanting to fuck.

Now when there is lust and love I don’t think one necessarily comes before the other in as much they develop together feeding one another.

My analogy for love and lust together was always kind of an intertwined relationship, like wisteria vines growing together, and encircling each other.

But I also like your idea, Elle, because the idea of them feeding each other, that means they are growing larger and larger.

As we all should be, haha.

Either could come first. Probably for more women, love comes first, but there has to be that spark, that chemistry all along too. Probably for more men, lust comes first and then develops into love. But those are generalities. I do find men are more forthcoming in pillow talk, and that develops more emotional closeness, so in those cases, lust comes first.

For me personally, lust can be with or without love, but with love it is deeper. Lust alone especially makes sense when you like things not everyone likes, and need to find partners who are into those, where you can at least share an interest or more, and a liking. Love can happen without lust in non-romantic relationships, but I need lust too in romantic ones. Though there can be that friend you secretly lust over. They are two different, but overlapping things.